Over there past month, we’ve seen two new celebrities emerge from obscurity and take the nation by storm. Of course I’m talking about Youtube singing sensation Greyson Chance and alleged Time Square bomber Faisal Shahzad. While both stars are riding the A-list, we here at CelebJihad.com thought we’d try to figure out which of the two heartthrobs is hotter.
First there is Greyson, a sexy 12-year-old from Oklahoma who is following in the footsteps of Justin Bieber. As a Muslim fundamentalist, I am an expert on young boys. In another life, I might have been a Catholic priest, LOL :). Of course I’m kidding, since both Catholics and those who believe in reincarnation are infidels who should be cleansed from the Earth with the righteous sword of Muhammad, but I digress. My point is, Greyson gets compared to Bieber, but I like him better because he’s younger (i.e. hotter). If my wives had a body like that instead of those disgusting curves and breasts, they’d be in for a lot less beatings (just kidding, no they wouldn’t).
But on the other hand, you have Faisal Shahzad. While he’s not as young as Greyson, his devotion to Islam is a total turn on. I know his car bomb didn’t work properly, but he gets an A for effort. Unfortunately, he’s already gone through puberty, which means a sexual relationship with him is strictly forbidden. But hey, a boy can dream, right? Oh wait, no. The Qur’an clearly states that dreaming is a sin.
I guess in that case, Greyson Chance wins on a technicality!